back on line

The break in… Well, I came to work last Thursday to find that our office had been broken into. They stole my computer, our microwave, and busted up our coke machine among other things. On the plus side I feel much better about the move across town now. On the bad side, I have been office hopping until my new computer comes in, I lost all of my personal stuff that was saved on my hard drive and on top of everything else, a girl in my office (that her job directly effects my job) quit Friday and instead of hiring someone else right before the move, I am now responsible for both positions. So that’s that.

Money money money……Good news, my W2 came in Friday so I filed my taxes Saturday. I literally now have 8 to 21 days until I can move and finally be free.

Roughed up…..So I was lucky that the last few weeks have been pretty uneventful at home. I knew it wouldn’t last forever though. He hasn’t been drinking near as much (because we’ve been so broke) so I know that has helped. Well he drank last night, a lot. I could see as soon as I got home he was in that potentially explosive state, not mad at all but super manic/drunk/loud/intense. When he’s like this he’s like a giant pimple about to burst on your mirror. So I opted to leave him alone and let him play his madden on the play-station and went in the bedroom to watch TV. I was pretty bummed because as the games are played in this dysfunctional relationship of mine, I still enjoy spending time with him when he is the him I fell in love with, and he has been that person lately. Anyway, I fell asleep watching TV and apparently didn’t hear him screaming for me. By the time I finally woke up and heard him, he had manifested into that beast of a man I dread. I walked into the living room and the front door was open, he was sitting in his chair. He had got up to pee out the front door (we have two bathrooms, he just does this out of pure laziness is suppose) and the dogs ran outside. I stood at the front door calling my dogs back in and I felt a huge shove, he got me right in the middle of my back and almost knocked me down the stairs of my from door but I caught myself. He literally knocked the breath out of me. I put my head down and turned to walk quietly back to the bedroom and he threw a bottle of Tylenol at me and they went everywhere. I picked them up. I went and laid down in the bed and actually thought he was done. Then he came in carrying the vacuum cleaner and threw it at me, Yes a VACUUM cleaner. Then he started grabbing things off of the dresser throwing them at me. Hairspray, pledge can, powder bottle. I instinctively covered my face with my arms, as I always do while under attack. The whole thing was only a couple of minutes then he turned an walked out and that was it. Every time I get roughed up I tend to not feel much at first. I guess after the shock or adrenaline or whatever wears off after a few minutes then the pain starts to set in and I know where to check for injury’s. It wasn’t too bad, I always feel much better if I don’t get it in the face, that seem to hurt much worse and takes longer to heal, not to mention you can’t hide it, not that I care anymore. So I ended up with a pretty big goose egg on my head, my arm is swollen and has a good cut and my muscles feel like I just did the Biggest loser boot camp video. People talk about the honeymoon phase when the man is super sweet and apologetic after the abuse. He stopped that years ago. I don’t even remember the last time he apologized to me. He either calms down and pretends it didn’t happen or he makes a joke out of it, which is what he did last night. He came in there a little while later and asked if I was ready to apologize to him and give him a kiss. I went to sleep. This morning he tried to get me to stay home from work because he was moaning saying he was super sick and his chest hurt. I went to work anyway. He called me after about and hour and said his chest was killing him and he couldn’t breathe. I told him to get some rest, I didn’t not give in to this fake heart attack manipulation this time. I can’t believe all of the years I fell for this crap and I let him play me like a violin. When I told his aunt this morning that she would have to call me on his phone because he had one of his episodes last night and smashed my prepaid phone (4th smashed phone now), she literally said, “bless his heart”. Yea poor freaking baby.


5 thoughts on “back on line

  1. Seriously? Bless his heart? I’d like to smash his aunt’s teeth in for that bullshit…I’m shaking right now…
    Anni….my soldier…my lil’ Boudicca….I love you. I am so sorry he fucked you up again…so so sorry…
    Stay on your toes (especially if you are surrounded by others as fucking blind as his aunt…) and look alive Sweetie!
    A little bit longer, touch down with B when you can too okay?
    We ❤ you….very much. XxOo

    Liked by 4 people

  2. Reblogged this on Americana Injustica and commented:
    So so so close now….

    Liked by 3 people

  3. Mental Cosmonaut says:

    I’m not really sure what to … say. I just gave my wife a hug and let her know I loved her.

    Liked by 2 people

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